If You Feel Like Shit, Clap Your Hands

"She sleeps alone, my heart wants to come home." -Beside You by 5 Seconds Of Summer

"So we're taking the long way home, 'cause I don't wanna be wasting my time alone." -Long Way Home By 5 Seconds of Summer

Hello my fellow members of society.

Wowzers, double quoting? I had to. I wanted to share these two songs and I just got inspired by them. Also, doesn't Long Way Home sound a bit like Good Life by OneRepublic? I like that.

Plus, I only had like 1 and a half hours of sleep last night and I don't think I can go back to sleep. Yay me.

I feel like shit. I'm not even gonna lie anymore. I thought I could blink back the tears or refrain from tweeting shit but I gave in to temptations.

I don't understand why people give me so much shit for liking a band. I'm sorry for showing my love for a band. I literally just talked about this a few days ago in a blog post.

I don't understand how some people think it's okay to make fun of someones sleeping disorder and then the next minute you go about as if you've done nothing wrong. That's not how things work.

Yea, at some point, I did not care but you know sometimes it's just too much. I'm just so sick and tired of getting shit thrown at me, you know. It's making me mentally unstable. I'm starting to think that I should have gotten the meds that my psychologist told me about. Sure, it wasn't recommended but if it could help me get through shit better, why not?

I'm sorry that I'm depressed, or have anxiety or insomnia. I can't help that I sleep at 3 or 4 am in the morning because I have a sleeping disorder. I'm sorry that I can't control my thoughts, thoughts that I can't escape.

There's a reason I'm always listening to music 90% of the time and when I do, I shut my world around me. I can't be alone and quiet for a long time cause it wouldn't be long before thoughts start flooding my mind. I need something that could keep me from thinking, even for a while.

I wish I didn't have thoughts about hurting myself with whatever I have in my hand but I promise I would never physically hurt myself. These wristbands and this necklace don't help at all.

I hate being so helpless and being the petty teenage child that no one can help.

I'm not trying to draw attention here. I just wish people would just stop giving me shit. I have enough to handle for myself without people giving me other things to worry about. Please stop before I can't go back.

I wanna get better you know. I'm trying but it's hard to push these thoughts away. 10 more days. I want to get better.

Sorry.